One thing I’ve learned in the past couple of years is that there are people who barely overthink, and then there are people like me who overthink everything. I have to admit that I sometimes feel jealous of those who don’t overthink as much. At first, I thought overthinking was normal and just part of life, but it isn’t. If you’re wondering whether you are an overthinker or simply someone who thinks things through, then this blog post is for you. I’m even sharing a few tips if you tend to overthink.
The Difference Between Thinking and Overthinking
Thinking
Let’s start with “normal” thinking. It is completely normal to have thoughts. In fact, the average person has between 6,000 and 70,000 thoughts a day. That is a lot. But having this many thoughts does not mean you are an overthinker. This is completely normal.
Thinking means that you are trying to solve a problem, plan something, or understand a situation. Thinking moves you forward toward a solution. It is helpful and often leads directly to an intentional choice or action.
For example, thinking might mean you suddenly realize you still need to go grocery shopping or clean something. When you have a thought like that, you usually act on it immediately or write it down so you can do it later. After that, you simply move on with your life.
Overthinking
Overthinking is different, but the total daily thought count isn’t necessarily higher. The biggest difference is that overthinking involves repeating the same thoughts over and over again. Let’s use the example of needing to go grocery shopping. With normal thinking, you realize you need to buy food, maybe make a list of what to buy, and then you go. With overthinking, you start wondering if you have enough food, analyzing when it’s best to go and whether it will be busy, thinking about whether it’s better to go tomorrow, and checking if you have enough food for breakfast. You might even start mentally planning meals. And it goes on and on.
Overthinking happens when you seek comfort and try to avoid perceived risks or danger, even when there is no real threat. You keep thinking the same thoughts repeatedly but never come to a conclusion. Overthinking can make you feel anxious, drained, and scattered. You often focus on the worst-case scenario because your brain is in survival mode and is trying to protect you. In the end, overthinking creates more problems and worry, and it can leave you feeling paralyzed.
Tips for overthinking
- Brain Dump
Sit down for 15 minutes and write down everything that comes to mind. It doesn’t matter what it is. This helps you clear your mind. Then look at everything you wrote down and see what kind of action you can take. Cross out everything that is out of your control. - The 5-4-3-2-1 Technique
This is a great way to ground yourself in the present moment. Every time you notice that you are overthinking and spiraling, stop yourself and name five things you can see, four things you can feel, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This brings your awareness back to the present moment. You can use this technique every time you notice you are overthinking. - Swap overthinking for action-based questions
You can overthink for an hour about how you should really clean something, but it is better to ask yourself better questions when you realize you are overthinking. Ask yourself: What can I do right now? Can I improve this situation? What is the next step forward? This helps you get out of your head and take action. - Schedule worry time
Allow yourself to worry for 10–15 minutes every single day. Try to do it at the same time each day so your brain learns that this is the designated time to worry. However, don’t do it right before bed, because it can keep you awake. Instead, do it right before or after dinner. This way, you still give yourself permission to worry, but after about 15 minutes, you simply stop. - Mindfulness/Meditation
These are two great things you can do when you want to stop worrying and overthinking all the time. Every time you notice you are starting to overthink or spiral, you can say: “I am overthinking this.” Then you bring your awareness back to the present moment. A lot of people use their breath as an anchor, but you can use anything you want.Photo by Teena Lalawat on Unsplash